Day 11: WDT '14

WDT '14

Well, I'm really paying for it today, despite careful planning.
My neck and shoulders and back and feet are all in pain.

I wanted to do it anyway, though I knew it would be this way.
I am willing to sacrifice comfort for what I perceive as gain.

The deafening roar and driving rhythms of the night
Carried me away and left me feeling insane.

I found that I, Amy, am on board the Wisconsin Death Trip
And I can't think of any reason I'd want to get off this train.

Day 10: All In

All In

It's done and done
and done some more
I've got the paper
I'm out the door

I'm finally finished
No more to take
Classes are done
Let's have some cake

I am a Master
They told me as much
I guess that's good
and happy and such

It's all over now
Think I'll head out
Take a long nap
and then scream and shout

I'll take a deep breath
and let out a sigh
I made it after all
So stick it in your eye

Day 9: Slacker

Slacker

So, I missed a few days.
So sue me!
Who's even reading this anyway?
Why do I even care?

Because I should.
Because I do.

Poetry is life,
and just like life
I can no longer
sit around and wait
for it to come to me.

Therefore and furthermore,
this becomes a building of a habit,
a practice of a practice,
to move past hurdles
and
    write
           every
                  day............................

Day 8: Pithy

Pithy

These lines will be silly
They won't be long
They're light as a lily
And soft as a song

I'm writing these lines
To prove that I can
For poems that shine
And fly from my hand

NaPoWriMo
Is what it is called
The trick is to go
And not to get galled

Just write what you feel
When it comes to mind
You'll see that it's real
If you let it unwind

Day 7: Meanwhile, I'm Expected

Meanwhile, I'm Expected

I'm expected, of course,
to remain steadfast,
to quell my desires,
to be demure,
to suffer in silence.

           Meanwhile, inside,
           I'm trying,
           I'm lying,
           I'm crying,
           I'm dying.

I'm expected, of course,
to have a smile on my face,
to hide any pain,
to be consistent,
to endure unbeknownst.

          Meanwhile, inside,
          I'm reeling,
          I'm keeling,
          I'm kneeling,
          I'm feeling.

I'm expected, of course,
to be perfect,
to say all the right things,
to be normal,
to hold onto my sanity.

          Meanwhile, inside,
          I'm dreaming,
          I'm scheming,
          I'm teeming,
          I'm screaming.

Day 6: Forgotten

I didn't post yesterday, but here's the entry for it:

Forgotten

In the hustle and flow

When the gale winds blow

In the pounding rain

Through the searing pain

Under the aching stars

With old and raging scars

With songs of atrophy

Where we used to be

Between me and you

I've forgotten us, too

Day Five: Fleshwound

Fleshwound

It only hurts for a second,
a tiny little sting
before the red courses down,
driving inexorably toward the drain,
a journey from deep brick
to dark scarlet
to bright crimson
to muted cinnabar
until finally, as it circles the drain,
the palest of pinks
criss-crossing
the porcelain white.

The ever-present question remains:
Will it be enough this time?

Day Four: Only

Only

I only thought of you a few times today,
which considering my history so far this year,
is quite the accomplishment.

Only six or seven times did your smile
wend its way into my subconscious.

Only eight or nine did I pause to sigh,
remembering the oh-so-soft-and-gentle
touch of your gone-too-long-lips.

Only twice did I fail to respond
when someone called my name
in the room where I was lost in reverie.

Only slightly did my pulse quicken as
I recalled the tiny tremble in your hand
before you thought to pull it away.

Only one tear, lost and lonely,
found its wayward way to my waiting cheek
before being swatted away in annoyance
that it came to call at all.

If only you loved me, too.

Day Three: Waveform

Waveform

The peaks and valleys unique to you
Rise and fall and roll and shiver
With the pitch and timbre
With depth of emotion hidden within
Extending to new heights
And sinking to new lows
All singularly simple
Yet complex and individual
As personal as a fingerprint
A visual representation of
Your verbal embrace
"I love you, Amy"
Printed on my arm
Indelibly on my soul

Say it again

Day Two: Diving In

(Note:  This comes late, as I found out about NaPoWriMo '14 a few days after it began.)

 

Diving In

 

Both feet eager,

Ever ready,

No fear,

No hesitation,

 

I leap -- 

 

In that very last moment

In those three heartbeats

A lifetime flashes

History relived

Worries revisited

 

Too late --

 

I am airborne

Giddy, gleeful

Unbound, unfettered

Alone, amazed

Diving in....

Day One: A-Okay

(Note:  This comes late, as I found out about NaPoWriMo '14 a few days after it began.)

A-Okay

And so, we begin--

An adventure in the making,

A journey for the taking.

A chance to just be,

Another stab at being me.

A way to spit it all out,

And let the demons scream & shout.

A time to reflect on all I've done,

And all those things I've not begun.

A calendaric friendly nudge,

Actually, a shove when I won't budge.

Another day, another night,

Another time to sit and write.

A strangled want in needing's clothes,

Aching all the way to my toes.

Aprehension, fear and greed,

All embedded in this need.

Another poem, another line,

Assurances that I am fine.

And suddenly, it ends.